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Clumsy Crafter: The Black Friday Mission.

Saturday, November 20, 2010

The Black Friday Mission.

I am a Black Friday shopper.

To say that I celebrate thanksgiving is but a part of the truth. Thanksgiving is like Christmas Eve, the moment of great anticipation before you rip into presents the next morning. To the real bargain shopper, it is pay dirt. The BB gun is to Ralphie in The Christmas Story as Black Friday is to pure frugalistas. Everyone else out there on Black Friday is just wearing a pink bunny suit.

Many comment that Black Friday is not worth the $20 of savings. If I only saved $20, I would consider it a great failure. 2002 was my best Black Friday year so far. I became a legend, somewhat in my own mind, when I came home with three shirts, one sweater, and one baby dress for only 15 cents. I saved the receipt in my wallet for weeks, showing everyone that would take a glance. Recounting the story numerous times of the saleswoman saying that she had never seen that before in her life. Apparently she had never met a true bargain hunter before.

There's rules to Black Friday.  First is to know your route and what you're looking for. Lists are made of deals at each store and the time the store opens so you can make a schedule and decide what your true priorities are. If you're standing in line outside a store, make friends with the person next to you and hold their place in line if they need to run to their car. However, if you are in line to pay in the store, no one will hold your place. If fact, they will call everyone they know on their phone and invite them personally to come take your place in line.

 Bed head mixed with the perfect mix of left over mascara is the official Black Friday uniform. You can always tell an impostor just by looking at their shoes first and their makeup, or lack there of, next. Heels will not cut it in the fast pace world of Black Friday. Dr. Scholls may be considered older generation but the perfect foot love will equal greater success. To put it simply, on Black Friday, make up and matching clothes are for sissies. If you have to get dressed in pure darkness and sneak out of the house like a covert operation than you will be a success.

Buyer beware, the Black Friday ads are slowly starting to be released. If you will be shopping in Fort Worth this coming Friday, you better watch out. The crazy woman in the white van that is wearing monkey pajamas and day old make up is one the loose and I've already made my lists.

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7 Comments:

Blogger Judith and Lance said...

Ok, Bobbie. Tell me the secrets of how to get the deals and where to find the ads b/c I'm going this year for the first time in my life. It kind of sounds miserable to me to be honest but I won't knock it until I've tried it. And, oh yea, I'll be that girl in heels you referred to on here, goodness I'm such an amatuer!

November 20, 2010 at 9:49 PM  
Blogger Damion said...

My wife sounds like a cross between Jack Bauer and Martha Stewert. She does get obsessive about black Friday and even sold my playstation 3 this year to rack up funds.

November 21, 2010 at 7:39 AM  
Blogger Casey said...

Oh man... good luck out there. Can I just tell you that I have never been to one single Black Friday sale. Ever. In my life. Never. I can't bring myself to get up that early. I wish I could. I am more of a Christmas eve shopper. Eh.

November 21, 2010 at 8:36 AM  
Blogger Serene @ MomFood said...

So funny. Better you than me. :-)

(I haven't ever done it, either. I do Buy-Nothing day that day, so I sleep in. :-) http://www.adbusters.org/campaigns/bnd

November 21, 2010 at 10:20 AM  
Anonymous Nicole said...

I LOVE IT!!! It's so nice to know that I'm not the only one :-)

November 21, 2010 at 5:17 PM  
Anonymous Alice said...

You are so funny...my favorite part about Black Friday will be sleeping in...

November 21, 2010 at 10:00 PM  
Anonymous Tulsa Courthouse said...

This is a great blog! I would really like to keep reading your blogs. Cant wait for the next post. Good blogs are hard to find!
tnx

November 26, 2010 at 7:53 AM  

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